I manifested a massive breakthrough in 2024

The year of boundaries

I spent 2024 knee-deep in the world of manifestation and personal growth, determined to figure out why I’d spent so much energy trying to please people who barely noticed. I wasn’t exactly sure what I was getting into—there was a vague idea of crystals, journaling prompts, or cosmic ordering systems—but I quickly zeroed in on something far more tangible: boundaries. Thanks to reading Dr. Nicole LePera’s How To Do The Work and Melissa Urban’s The Book of Boundaries, I realized I’d been giving way too many free passes to people in my life.

Armed with a new “No is a complete sentence” philosophy, I finally accepted that maybe being “the bigger person” actually meant being big enough to prioritize myself once in a while. Groundbreaking concept, right?

Family challenges and realizations

A major catalyst for all this soul-searching was a conflict with someone in my family—someone I’d historically tiptoed around. When I missed a gathering in 2023 due to health reasons, let’s just say the reaction was less than open-minded. The relationship became strained, and communication fizzled.

I’d always been conditioned to reach out, to keep the peace, to be the one who smooths over rough edges. But something clicked in 2024: maybe I didn’t have to make myself small to smooth over every tense family dynamic. Maybe it was okay if I didn’t always chase after someone’s approval. Maybe boundaries weren’t just for corporate email etiquette—actually, they were about to change my life.

I also found strength in my kids’ well-being, determined to break old patterns instead of passing them down. Along the way, I read Stephanie Foo’s exceptional book on complex PTSD, What My Bones Know, which gave me deeper insight into how complex PTSD can shape our worldview.

Therapeutic discoveries (EMDR, and an ADHD assessment)

While navigating, my family tightrope, I tried EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing). It felt like rummaging around a haunted attic with a flashlight, illuminating dusty corners I’d always avoided. Turns out, I’d been letting fear run the show.

At the same time, I finally got an ADHD assessment—something that had been on my to-do list for years. It was an assessment I’d been thinking about doing for 4 years (What was stopping me? Fear, of course!). The results showed me just how much my mind had been juggling behind the scenes.

I dove into concussion recovery in a way that I hadn’t before, manifesting a recovery program at a Toronto hospital. Focusing on holistic health—mind, body, and spirit—became my new priority.

Authenticity and beyond

So, what did all this boundary-setting and self-realizing deliver? Honestly, it wasn’t the kind of “manifestation” I’d envisioned (no giant house, no massive windfall). Instead, I gained a much deeper understanding of my own trauma and my inner child. After reading How Not to Fit In, a book addressing adult ADHD and autism (though I’m not diagnosed with the latter), I had a massive epiphany: a lot of my “do it all, do it perfectly” persona was masking ADHD.

Which brings me to January 2025. I’ve been doing TBM’s Authenticity Challenge, which feels perfectly timed for someone who’s spent a lifetime playing the “buttoned-up, type A” role. It prompted big questions:

• What if I’m not actually a high-strung, type-A person?

• What if that persona is a trauma response to a difficult childhood, mixed with ADHD and anxiety?

• What if the personality I’ve shown to the world has been a coping mechanism serving everyone else’s needs but my own?

It’s startling to realize the line between self-preservation and masking can be razor-thin. Yet here I am, stepping out of a year-long exam with ink-stained hands and a glimmer of clarity. I don’t have to be the neat-and-tidy version of myself 24/7. My authentic self is a bit messier, a bit more scattered, but also more curious, creative, and kind—to both myself and others.

What a breakthrough! WOW. As 2025 kicks off, I’m ready for a paradigm shift—bring it on! If you’re in a similar place, ask yourself: Which boundaries can you set to protect your peace? Where are you masking who you really are? Sometimes the most unexpected journey turns out to be the one we need the most.

Here’s to leaning into our authentic selves—and finally internalizing that “no” really can be a complete sentence.

If you’ve had your own boundary-setting moments or discoveries, drop a comment or share your story. Let’s learn from each other’s paths.